Safety

Talking about big things should feel safe. Here is how BeforeVows is built to help, what you can do, and where to find support.

Safety features

• You answer alone. Your partner does not see your answers while you answer.
• Your partner sees limited information. Only your answer on topics where you differ, after you both finish and both approve. Never your notes, never your private safety answers.
• Private safety questions. A few questions are only for you. No one else sees them, including your partner.
• Invitations are careful. The person you invite sees only your first name until they accept. They can decline, block you, or report you.
• You can leave any time. End a connection with one tap. Delete your account whenever you want.
• Block and report. Block anyone who invites you. Report anything that worries you.
• Quick exit. On safety pages, one tap leaves the site immediately.
• Verified sign-in. We email a one-time sign-in link to confirm each person's email address.
• Your data is protected. Answers and notes are encrypted, and our team cannot read your answers.

Safety tips

• Only invite and answer with someone you know and trust to be treated with respect.
• Answer on your own, on your own device. If someone is watching or insisting on seeing your answers, you do not have to continue.
• You are free to choose "Prefer not to answer" on any question.
• Read your report on your own first if you want to. You can talk about it when you are ready.
• If a conversation feels unsafe, stop. You do not have to discuss anything you are not ready for.
• Share your decision sheet only with people you choose. It never contains your answers.
• Watch for pressure from a partner or family to join, answer a certain way, pay or approve. That is not okay, and you can end the connection.
• Use a private browser window on a shared device and sign out when you finish.

Safety resources

If you are in danger now, call your local emergency number (911 in the US, 112 in India).

United States

• 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Call or text 988, or chat at 988lifeline.org Free, confidential, 24/7.
• National Domestic Violence Hotline: Call 1-800-799-7233, or text START to 88788, or chat at thehotline.org Free, confidential, 24/7. Message and data rates may apply to texts.
• Emergency: Call 911

India

• Tele-MANAS: Call 14416 or 1800-891-4416 Toll-free, 24/7, about 20 languages (Ministry of Health and Family Welfare).
• Emergency: Call 112

Other countries: find free, confidential helplines in your country at findahelpline.com. Free directory of crisis and domestic-violence lines by country.

Numbers last verified October 9, 2026. They are read from our verified helpline list.

Report a concern

Use Report a problem in the service, or write to support@beforevows.app. If someone is in immediate danger, contact emergency services first.